


When I Look At You

by Liza1031



Series: K-S-H-C One-Shots (glee) [15]
Category: Glee
Genre: Anderson-Hummel Child - Freeform, Anderson-Hummel Family, Birth, Breastfeeding, Fluff, Glee - Freeform, Husbands, Love, M/M, Male Lactation, Marriage, Mpreg, Original Blaine Anderson/Kurt Hummel Child(ren), Parents Blaine Anderson & Kurt Hummel, Pregnancy, Pregnant Blaine Anderson, homebirth, labor, mpreg!blaine
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-17
Updated: 2020-12-17
Packaged: 2021-03-11 04:08:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28138923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Liza1031/pseuds/Liza1031
Summary: Blaine has a home birth.
Relationships: Blaine Anderson/Kurt Hummel
Series: K-S-H-C One-Shots (glee) [15]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2059374
Kudos: 4





	When I Look At You

•Blaine•

I jolted awake as I felt her prod around inside me. I was in a deep sleep when she decided to wake me. Inwardly groaning, I try to move to my other side to get comfortable and notice the time on the iHome.

**_January 12th_ **

**_5:20am_ **

I roll my eyes not wanting to start my day this early and just continue to move to my side so I can go back to sleep. I sighed, closing my eyes and felt Kurt stir behind me. I held my breath hoping I didn't wake him and thankfully he remained quiet and asleep.

As I tried to fall back asleep, I rested my hand over my distended belly and got lots of kicks to my palm. She was definitely awake but wasn't going to get her way, not at this hour anyway. However, each time she kicks there's a cramp that follows behind it. Nothing too bad but it was enough to keep me up.

I spent about thirty minutes just laying there certain I was having mild contractions. I refused to wake Kurt knowing he'd be antsy if he didn't get a full night's worth of "beauty rest" as he puts it. So by 6am, I lifted the covers from my body and got myself out of bed, careful not to wake my husband. With the room still dark, I used my phone screen so I could see where I was going and made my way into our bathroom. Every morning I have to pee thanks to her always making herself comfortable on my bladder.

I take care of my business and as I'm washing my hands I get another pain so I dry my hands on a small rag hanging off the hook and grip onto the marble countertop, breathing slowly. The pain wasn't bad at all but it was still there and I've been taught to breathe through them so I'm not putting all those classes and hours spent watching videos to waste.

While the contraction lasted, I could feel her still moving around, clearly hyper as she was getting ready for her grand entrance into the world. I, on the other hand, haven't fully grasped the concept of her coming so soon. I mean sure my due date is pretty much next week, it's just, we've been waiting for nine months and the moment was finally here, well almost here.

Feeling the pain start to go away, she continued to kick so I looked down and smiled at my bump. I rubbed my hands down the sides and curve, bringing them to the center just under my belly button that was poking out.

"I know you're getting excited, honey." I pressed my fingers against the taut skin and she kicked again. "You'll be here soon." I whisper. "Hopefully."

With a heavy sigh, I turn off the bathroom light and open the door to the bedroom. Kurt was still asleep so I crept out of our bedroom slowly and made my way downstairs to our living room. I stood by the window, with both hands on my baby belly, watching the city wake up and get ready for the day. I took in a refreshing breath and listened. The house was quiet and it was peaceful.

I stood in by the window for a couple minutes watching as the sun started to rise and create a crisp golden blanket over the skyscrapers and office buildings. There was some snow on the ground far below but not enough for it to be a winter wonderland, though, you'd never really get that in New York City considering all the dirt and grime. A warm smile found its way onto my face just thinking how lucky I am to be living here. It's always been my dream to come home and make something out of myself. Now here I was a successful music producer, happily married, with a baby on the way. My life took a turn for the better and I'm so grateful I have my husband, Kurt, by my side through everything.

Another hour quickly rolled by and I had walked around the entire downstairs of our house hoping to get things moving and get her out quicker. Kurt was still sleeping so it's been nice getting this time to myself. I walked my way through some more contractions and kept my hands on my back applying some pressure. It helped a ton pushing myself forward and relieving the aches that were building up.

I walked around for a while and my feet started to hurt so I went into our spare room and rolled out the birthing ball I made Kurt buy. It sat in here ready to go for when it was needed, along with the many other supplies that were ordered for our home birth. I didn't want to get a lot of stuff but Kurt insisted we be safe with extra stuff then be sorry we don't have enough. So, leave it to this little girl's daddy to go overboard and get everything that was for sale online or in a catalog.

I brought the ball with me to the living room and set it in front of the tv so I could bounce while watching it. I decided to text my midwife, Bonnie, to let her know what's been going and that I think I'll be having the baby sometime today or tomorrow.

She told me to keep her updated and let her know how labor goes and such. So I set my phone down onto the glass coffee table and turned on the tv as I bounced on the rubber ball. I kept my movements slow and consistent, not wanting to hurt the baby or myself for that matter. I know she's enjoying the bouncing as she keeps kicking and I can see my belly moving under the fabric of my old Dalton shirt.

I continued to bounce on the ball for a while and Kurt finally woke up. He came downstairs and was surprised to find me on the ball.

"What are you doing?" He asks, confused.

"Well good morning to you too!" I playfully scold and roll my eyes at him.

"I'm sorry." He frowns and comes to greet me with a kiss. "Morning my love."

"Mmm, morning baby." I smile and stare at him above me. "I'm bouncing on the ball because I'm in labor but don't panic because I have everything under control. I already notified Bonnie and we've been doing okay so far."

"We?" He cocks an eyebrow.

"Yeah, me and our daughter. Who's been very active this morning and woke me up." I tell him and pat my bump.

"Oh I see." His face softens and his lips curl into a small smile. "Well would the little miss like some tea this morning?" He asks, leaning down towards my belly.

"She would love some and so-" I pucker my lips letting Kurt plant another kiss on them. "-would her momma."

"Alright my love. I'll have it ready in a few minutes."

"Perfect, thanks babe."

He shoots me a wink before walking off to the kitchen still dressed in his plaid pajama pants and white t-shirt. I stayed on the ball in front of the tv while he made our tea, then moved to the couch so we could go about with our usual morning routine.

While I drank my tea and Kurt flipped through a magazine, I got a very strong contraction, causing me to lean forward and press my hands to my belly as it hardened. I placed my cup down onto the table and tried to breathe through the sudden pain.

"Sweetheart?" I can see Kurt move up from the corner of my eye and felt his hand rest lightly on my back.

"C-Contraction." I exhale and continue to breathe. "Oh god."

"Just keep breathing baby. Breathe Blaine."

"I-I'm tr-trying. Hurts." I whimper as my body tenses up and muscles tighten.

After a few sharp breaths, I leaned back against the couch and looked towards my husband.

"That was a big one." I say to him. He nods, agreeing with me and closes his magazine. He moves over to me and places his hands on my bump. I close my eyes and rub my hand along his back as he keeps his soft hands against my belly, interacting with our daughter. "She loves you so much already, Kurt."

"You think so?" He asks, looking up at me.

"Yeah. She's always moving around whenever you talk to her and feel around for her, it's like she knows it's you."

"Well I am her daddy so hopefully she knows who I am. I sing to her and talk to her whenever I get the chance to."

"And she's so glad you do. It makes her happy." I say and he smiles, moving up to face me. "It makes me happy too." His smile grows as he places a sweet kiss to my lips.

**-Few Hours Later-**

**(2:42pm)**

"Kurt!" I call out for my husband as I'm stuck leaning against the wall in the hallway. "Kurt! Where are you?!" I groan as another contraction ripples inside me and brings more discomfort. "Kurt!"

"I'm here, babe. I was getting the compress."

"Thank god." I loudly exhale and feel him press the cool compress to my hips, applying pressure. "Oooh that feels so much better." I moan and roll my head back, inhaling and exhaling as I ride the wave of the contraction. When it ended, I kept myself leaning onto the wall with Kurt behind me still applying pressure to my hips with the compress.

Around noon, I was able to lay down and get some rest in between contractions but I woke up not too long ago as they got closer and longer.

"Sweetheart?"

"Hmm?" Kurt hums next to me.

"C-Can you let Bonnie know about m-my contractions and a-ask if sh-she can come over now?"

"Of course, babe. Are you gonna be okay while I go get my phone?"

I nod and close my eyes, feeling the compress be removed and hearing him walk away. He returned a few seconds later and kept his hand on my back while he called my midwife to let her know what's been going on.

Their conversation lasted a few minutes and when he hung up, I got another contraction so he kept his hands firm against my hips while I became a bit vocal through the pain.

"This hurts so much, Kurt. Ooh god." I moan as my teeth chattered. "Help me."

"What do you want me to do, baby? I'm right here, whatever you need."

"I need to get off my feet and lie down or-or something." I exhale and groan loudly.

"Okay." He says softly and lets me finish with the contraction before moving me over to our living room where he had a bunch of pillows, blankets, towels, and our birthing pool set up ready to be used. It was being filled at the moment with a hose we attached to the shower head.

With his help, I was lowered onto the floor, staying on all fours feeling some relief in my legs. My belly hung heavy under me and Kurt came to sit in front of me. I wrapped my arms around his neck and held onto him, using him as leverage. I laid my head on his shoulder and he hummed a familiar tune into my ear with his arms around me.

"Don't let me go." I whisper feeling our upper bodies starting to sway.

"Never." He whispers back and kisses my mop of black curls. "I have you, always."

We stayed in this position until there was a knock at our door. Kurt went to go answer and welcomed our midwife in. She carried in her bags filled with equipment, notepads, and other things she might need for the baby. She smiled when she saw me and got down onto the floor next to me, while Kurt sat back in front of me.

"Hi Blaine, contractions still about five or six minutes apart?" She asks, rubbing my back.

"Yeah. They last for almost forty seconds."

"Okay." She says softly and goes digging through her bag pulling out some latex gloves and a doppler. "I wanna do a quick exam to see where you're at then see if we can listen to her heartbeat. Has she moved around a lot?"

"Yeah. She woke me up around five this morning and I started to get contractions after that."

"Alright, so let's see how close this little girl is from coming." She puts the gloves on and lets my turn around so that I'm on my back with my legs spread in front of her. "Just relax for me Blaine. You're gonna feel some pressure and discomfort but it's all normal, okay?"

"Mhm." I nod, closing my eyes.

"Okay," She sighs and I squeeze Kurt's hand, groaning from the feeling. "I know sweetie, I know. I'm sorry." Kurt kept hold of me while she had her fingers inserted in my entrance. "Water bag is still intact so we'll see if it breaks naturally and if not then we'll go from there depending on the baby's position. You're four centimeters and one hundred percent effaced. So you still have a bit to go, Blaine." She says and pulls her fingers out.

I relaxed against my husband while she turned the doppler on and pressed the small head under my bump. It didn't take long for her to find our daughter's heart and it was beating loudly.

"Everything sounds clear and strong, boys." She says and leaves it on for a few minutes then takes it off and moves it to the side.

I stayed on my back against Kurt for an hour and a half, breathing through my contractions still. But, I started to get uncomfortable so they helped me back to my feet and I waddled my way towards our bathroom. I felt like I had to go but instead got another sharp pain and heard a loud gush. I looked down and saw I was now standing in a puddle of amniotic fluid.

"Kurt! Bonnie!"

They both come running and stop once they see my water has broken.

"This is good, Blaine." Bonnie says and goes around to get to me while Kurt places a towel on the floor to soak it up. "We can get you into the pool now if you'd like. Relieve some of the tension in your body and hopefully get you closer to pushing." She adds.

Luckily, Kurt had been filling the pool up for the majority of the afternoon so Bonnie brought me back out to the living room and helped me step into the pool. I removed my shirt and lowered down into the water.

When I got in the warm pool it melted the tension out of my legs and arms and felt like heaven. I sat against the edge with my back pushing against the sturdy plastic, keeping my lower half emerged in warm water. I kept my eyes closed and focused on my breathing. As I felt the contraction start, I moved up into a more squatted position while gripping the side of the pool through the pain.

Keeping my volume low and my breaths quick, I got through the 45 second contraction and lowered myself back into the water.

Kurt kept a steady supply of iced cloths on my neck and back to help with the heat radiating off my body from the tension I was feeling both inside and out.

Being in the pool was helping a lot and I was hopeful that I was going to get the water birth I planned. I read how some people prefer a birthing pool or tub but that it hurts more to push in the water. I'm not sure what it'll be like for me since every pregnant person is different, especially someone like me.

Before long, the assistant midwife arrived and wasted no time with getting to my side. Kurt was off getting more cool cloths and taking care of other things so I was thankful she showed up just in time.

As I sat in the pool, contractions were coming one after the other and an intense amount of pressure was starting to build up down near my entrance. I wasn't feeling the urge to push just yet but everything was starting to hurt more at this point. With the one I was getting now, I didn't move into a squat like I had done previously and instead stayed put while Vanessa coached me through the pain, her voice was so comforting and nurturing.

"Breathe slowly, Blaine. In through your nose and out through your mouth." I kept my eyes focused on her as she exemplified the easy breathing technique. I copied her breathing and we did it several times until the ripples of pain were gone. "You did great during that one. Bonnie said you're getting close to having the baby now?"

"Yes." I exhale and lean back against the pool again. "I don't feel like I have to push though." I say while rubbing my hand around the taut skin of my swollen belly.

"That's okay. You're in the transition stage so it shouldn't be long now." She smiled and stayed seated outside the pool but still next to me ready to tackle my next contraction with me.

I continued to labor in the pool for another hour or so with Vanessa and Kurt both with me while Bonnie stood on the far side watching me as I labored and encouraged me much like my husband and her assistant did.

I started to feel this different feeling of pressure down my entrance and it was weird. "Oooh." I moaned and closed my eyes, slowly letting my breath go through my slightly parted lips. "I think her...I think I can feel her head moving." I felt a small smile spread across my face as it gave me peace of mind that I was making progress, and the motivation to keep working hard.

"She's most likely getting into the position to come out. You feeling like pushing soon?"

I inwardly hum and shake my head while closing my eyes as I rest my head back on the edge of the pool. My fingers stayed on my extended bump as I felt her wriggle around under my touch. It's crazy to think that in just a matter of time she'll be out of there and in my arms.

I worked through about another twenty minutes worthy of tough contractions before I was given the okay to push.

Everything hurt so much and trying to push into that hurt seemed impossible. "Kurt! Kurt where are you?!" I call out for my husband who disappeared for a second.

"I'm coming!" He calls running from the hall. "I was using the bathroom, I'm sorry love. I'm here Blaine, I'm here." I reach back and feel him behind me. "I'm right here baby, I'm not going anywhere." He says while coming closer to me. He brings his hands forward and wraps them around my shoulders while I lean my head against his chest waiting for the contraction to come.

When I started to feel the pain, I tucked my hands behid my thighs under the water and pulled them back towards my chest while I buried my chin into my chest and bore down.

It hurt a lot, more than I had thought but I knew I could do this, if not for me then for her at least. 

I counted to ten in my head and let my breath go and grip around my legs loosen before inhaling another deep breath to go again. I squeezed my eyes shut as I pushed as it somehow helped with the pain and pushing. Vanessa was right next to me as she was looking between me and the baby emerging from my entrance.

"Good Blaine. I can see some of her head." Bonnie says. I open my eyes to see her with a mirror under the water. I try to move my head in an odd direction so I could watch myself birth my daughter's head but I couldn't see much of it yet. I groaned feeling another contraction and got right back into pushing. "Yes! That's it Blaine! She's coming, hun!"

I loudly exhaled and sucked in more air to continue pushing as the contraction lasted.

"Go, go, go! More, more, more!" I let my breath go and lean back against Kurt's chest again. "Good job."

My chest heaving as I laid back, taking a short break.

"You're doing wonderful, my love." Kurt says while whisking away the curls that stuck to my sweaty face. He pressed his cool hand to my hot skin and it brought me some relief feeling him on me. Unfortunately, the loving feeling didn't last long as the contraction came and I closed my eyes, gripping my legs, ready to push.

While I was pushing, I could feel her head stretching and making its way through my entrance. It burned like crazy but I had to keep my focus on getting her out. When I reached ten, I let it all go and tried to peer down at the mirror. I was awestruck when I could see the dark almond shape sitting in between my legs, emerging from inside my body. I took no shame in reaching my hand down to touch her head.

A whimper released from my lips as I graciously smiled feeling my daughter's head just beneath my finger tips.

"I feel her Kurt." I say to my husband already knowing he's smiling down at the sight. "She's got a lot of hair too, babe."

I kept my hand over the little bit of my daughter's head and left it there as I pushed again. Bonnie remained hands off per request and just let me do what I did with my baby. Feeling her head gave me more motivation than before, it was so breathtaking that she was right there.

The next contraction that came was more painful than the last and caused me to remove my hand from my daughter's head and put it back behind my thigh as I felt I needed to push harder and more aggressively to get her out. A mere scream bursts from my lips feeling the ring of fire around my entrance the more I pushed. It was intense and difficult to push through. I stopped and took several deep breaths before starting up again.

As I felt her head reach its full crown, I brought both hands back down to feel and gave another slight push which brought out her eyes, nose, and mouth. I stopped to catch my breath and pushed once more fully delivering her head.

"Oh my." I breathe out and look down into the water. Some blood and fluids were seeping their way into the water from her head being out but I didn't care. I could just see the top of her head past my belly. I couldn't help but smile holding her head in my hand while I brought the other to my bump. "She's almost out, Kurt. I can't believe she's almost here."

"I know sweetheart. You're doing amazing." Kurt continuously tangled his fingers through my sweaty hair, providing me as much comfort as he could. "I-"

"Oooh, ow." I whine feeling my body start to push her out. I gave in and just pushed while Bonnie advised me about checking a cord. I waited until I pushed her neck out far enough to feel and sure enough she did have it wrapped around her. Thankfully, my midwife still remained hands off and let me take care of it.

I pressed my lips together while stretching both hands down in between my legs and unwrapped the cord from around her neck. Relieved I got it off, I still had the shoulders to deliver and it hurt like hell.

"Oh god!" I moan and sharply inhale trying to push. "Oooh, please make it stop. Ow!"

"Blaine, you have to push okay? She's almost out just a few more big pushes."

It was now or never. My daughter was going to be in here within a few minutes and it was all up to me to bring her here.

I kept myself against my husband's chest, feeling his lips leave sweet kisses down my cheek and shoulder as I started to push. He coached me through every ounce of pain I was experiencing and every breath I was using to bring our baby into the world.

"Push Blaine! Push! Push! Push!"

"Big push, baby. Big push." Kurt whispers into my ear.

I held onto my daughter while I pushed and tugged a bit to get her out. She has stretched me to my width and I was on the verge of passing out from all the pain.

"AAGH!" I scream, letting my go of my spent breath. Breathing heavily, I sucked in another deep breath and pushed down hard. "Here she comes." I managed to say as I was pushing. She started to squeeze out some more until I felt her released from my body and I let out a small yelp from the feeling.

A few splashes and I brought her little blue self up from the water and onto my chest. She wasn't crying and was silent was lying almost limp on my body.

"Come on sweetheart." I began to vigorously rub her back, trying to get her to breathe or cry or cough. "Come on baby, come on love." She started to squirm then let out a small whimper and I was in awe watching her come to life. It was amazing. Her cries got louder and stronger and I was overjoyed. "There you are, darling. Hi sweet girl."

I couldn't take my eyes off this beautiful creature we created together. She cried and it was music to my ears. I held her to my chest while steadying my breathing and trying to wrap my head around the fact that I just had a baby. Tears slowly streamed down my cheeks while I fell in love with this beautiful little girl.

"Oh honey." Kurt was looking over my shoulder as tears cascaded down his pale cheeks. "She's beautiful, Blaine. You did a fantastic job sweetheart. I'm so proud of you." He says before giving me a kiss. "Hi baby girl. Hi baby." We both watched as our daughter turned her head and opened her eyes at Kurt, recognizing his voice from all those times he sang or spoke to her while she was inside my belly.

I couldn't believe how chubby she was or that she had so much dark hair. Overall she was stunning and she was all ours. I never wanted to let her go and held her in my arms while Vanessa dipped a towel into the water and let me wrap her in it to keep her warm.

She kept opening her eyes and looking up at us, it was amazing.

"Hi sweetheart, hi beautiful girl." I smile down at her as more tears rush down my cheeks. "Welcome to the world baby girl." She whimpers a bit so I move her closer to my chest.

"She probably wants to eat, you can try feeding her if you're up for it." Bonnie says.

"Okay." I nod and look up at Kurt who nods too. I glanced back down at my daughter and brought her to my nipple. I held my finger out and helped her latch on, it took her a few minutes but she quickly got the hang of it and was eating in no time.

Our eyes never left her as she ate and made the most adorable suckling sounds. She ate like a champ, she sure was hungry. I kept one arm holding under her while the other was on top moving pieces of her wet hair out of her hair. She had my curls but they were perfect on her. She was absolutely beautiful.

After she ate, I was helped up and still held onto her while I pushed up the placenta. It wasn't a pretty sight but once it was taken care of, I went over to the covered couch and Bonnie let Kurt cut her cord then she weighed and measured our baby girl.

Kurt held her afterwards while Vanessa helped me upstairs, letting me shower and clean up. She gave me whatever assistance I needed while getting dressed then got me settled into bed. Kurt came up with our daughter shortly after as well as Bonnie who checked me again and gave me a few drops of some remedy to help my body with the shock of the labor and delivery. He handed me our daughter and she laid on my chest still asleep.

"Well boys, everything looks good with her and with you Blaine. You did a great job." Bonnie says, smiling at me. "Does this beautiful little girl have a name?"

"Mhm, we decided to name her Ella James Hummel-Anderson."

"Aww, that's a beautiful name you guys." She comes over and smiles at the baby as she slept on my chest. "Well we'll take care of everything downstairs, don't worry about it. Just rest up and enjoy your baby girl. Can we get you guys anything to eat or drink?"

"A smoothie and a sandwich would be nice." I tell her.

"You got it. Kurt?"

"Same goes for me."

"Alright. I'll go make you guys something to eat and will be up shortly."

"Okay, thanks." I smile as they walk out of the room leaving both Kurt and I here.

I laid down some more against the pillows, feeling my Ella's soft breaths on my chest as she slept peacefully in my arms.

That night, Kurt and I marveled at our little girl. I couldn't even express how magical it was to be comfortable in our own bed, snuggled all together, resting after a long and exciting day. Things couldn't have gone better and I was completely overwhelmed with gratitude and love.

**-One Week Later-**

Kurt and I have been getting used to life with our daughter, Ella. I've gotten used to nursing her, while pumping is still a struggle but I've been slowly doing it more and more so Kurt took some of the feedings at night.

We're both so grateful for the life we have with Ella and wouldn't change a thing about it.

Right now, I was home with Ella while Kurt went down to the market to pick up a few things we needed.

The house was quiet and I was sitting in Ella's nursery, feeding her. She's been taking the feedings really well and I love this bonding time we get to spend with each other everyday. I just stare at her in awe everyday in disbelief that she's even real or that she's ours.

She takes after me and has the most beautiful olive skin, my soft black curls, and my nose. But she also has Kurt's ocean blue eyes and his cute little pouty lips. She's just so amazing.

When she was done eating, I took her off my nipple and brought her up to my shoulder so she could burp. Once she was all set and situated, I laid her back onto my bare chest and slowly rocked her while we sat in the chair.

"Oh Ella," I rubbed my hand around her small back. "My sweet girl, don't ever grow up on us okay? You're gonna stay our little girl forever." I tell her and kiss the top of her head. I close my eyes, continuing to rock her in my arms as we both relaxed and fell asleep together. 


End file.
